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I have learned so much more about myself as of late. I have learned that I have gotten up more times than I have fallen. Sometimes those falls were such that I did not believe that I could possibly get up…but apparently I did. An if you are reading this, apparently so have you.
In retrospect I see that I had gotten so consumed with the pain & sense of loss from the falls, that I failed to recognize and allow myself to feel proud of the accomplishments of getting up after each fall. I would venture to guess that it was an easy oversight because the getting up was at times a very slow, difficult, and challenging process. Literally moment by moment, choice by choice, steps of action. It’s easy to lose sight of having pulled myself up from the rabbit hole of despair when so consumed from the fatigue of scraping up through each increment of upward movement.
Kind of crazy to lose sight of the celebrating the joy of victory for focusing on preparation for the next fall. But as we all know, it happens. Change occurs whether we notice it or not, whether we celebrate it, or accept it, or not.
As I write a thought comes to mind from so many years ago when some of my co-workers made a decision to try to teach me how to become “bitchier” because I was “too nice”. In a move of solidarity, strength, and support, they had this clever idea to teach me to be stronger, more powerful, and more committed to “biting back”. I chuckle and my heart warms with love and joy as I think back upon this amazingly powerful group of women that I was blessed to have had in my life. They were going to help me change.
As time has passed and as I have journeyed into levels of self-awareness and spiritual surrender far deeper than I had planned (because life has a way of doing that for us), I have come to more fully realize that my kindness, compassion, and softness ARE part of the wonderfully feminine and fierce superpowers that make me the phenomenal woman that I am. My perceptions that those qualities made me weak have changed, and as such that change has moved me into greater levels of self-acceptance.Self-acceptance offers the opportunity for amazing transformation to occur. In my own recent experiences of stripping away yet more of the barriers I had created from fear, I fell more deeply into myself. I saw the depths of kindness, love, & compassion that I am made of, that I am capable of. I felt the power of the fierce flames of life burning strong within me. I realized that my femininity and passionate womanness are in fact my inherent SuperPowers and should no longer be suppressed, denied, belittled, or squelched. What are your SuperPowers? I encourage you to discover what they are.
Confidence arises with self-acceptance. In letting go of resisting that I like being a girly girl, that I like sugar and spice and everything nice, that I am quite sentient, that I cry, hurt, or rejoice easily because I feel deeply, that the power & wisdom of softness and kindness give rise before mental determination and will, I have discovered that I really, really like who I am. It’s quite nice to not feel guilty, bad, wrong, or apologetic for being who I am. It feels wonderful to give freedom to my voice in ways I had not done before.
I am an amazingly strong, courageous, and powerful woman because of all of my gifts, talents, skills, and natural qualities that arise from being freely myself. Who are you, really? Where do you make yourself small or dim your shine from fear, or to try to make others feel more comfortable?I am frilly skirts and scruffy shoes, I am ribbons, lace, jeans, and boots. I am day and night shining bright with sunshine and moonlight. I am both the stars and the morning dew that give rise to imaginings of something new. I am an endless stream of possibilities in motion. I am the pain of life that cracks open into the emergence of the soaring eagle flying free. I am love in action falling into the depths of vulnerability to become the rising phoenix of loves divine expression untethered, untainted, limitless; the space of fullness and emptiness simultaneously where all possibilities exist, where I am you…and you are me!
I champion you to Be courageous, be yourself, move gently into the confidence of the vulnerability of your true self. It is a most powerful place to learn to be. That vulnerability is the doorway to your infinite power of being, into owning and becoming the you that the universe created you to be, SuperPowers and all. Baby steps, baby steps. Breathe in, breathe out, rise, & if you should fall, glide, strive, learn, grow, evolve…EMERGE! Repeat.
Wishing you love, joy, & peace,